Type on your computer whenever someone walks past
Be the office assassins creed and hit that keyboard when the office guards approach. You don’t want to be caught off guard at any point. ever.
Clear out your food from the fridge
Everybody loves clearing out week old fungus from the shelves. Oh wait. No. No they don’t. And they especially don’t want it anywhere their own food!
Send emails at absurd hours
This is especially important to come across as a workaholic. All those in the office will revel at your nocturnal ability while still maintaining grammatical correctness.
Don’t choose the toilet cubicle next to an occupied stall
Where possible of course. This is especially important when communal office toilets are shared by more than one company on your floor. Nobody likes peeing in close proximity to others – wall or no wall.
Keep your desk messy
You know what…
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